some thoughts

lacking complete growth, differentiation, or development

The other day we had a critique in my portfolio class for our most recent project. My professor referred to my project as immature, which is the definition you see above. I don't know why, but for some reason the things this particular professor says impact me more so then anyone else I know. I feel like every time he speaks he hits the nail right on the head, and although sometimes it is positive other times it's rather hurtful. And I know that he's right, which is why I haven't been able to get his words out of my mind.

At the beginning of the semester he told me my photos were no longer raw, they were just technically pleasing. So now while trying to balance these two elements, the raw and the technical I think I've gotten confused. My ideas have started clumping together, and I'm just shooting the same thing over and over again.

I don't know what to do.

I really thought I was finally going in the right direction with my work, but now with these words like immature and cliche....I feel like my work no longer belongs to me. The terms he used made my feel like some agnst-y teenage girl, running around writing my sorrows on the wall. Which is only half true, and I really don't want to be seen like that. ANYWAY,

Ideas Driftin Away

"Watch your moving in elliptical pattern Think it's not what you say What you say is way too complicated" 1901- Pheonix

Mar 2010

Self Portrait

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I haven't taken a self portrait since I started school. So this was really a personal challenge. I wanted to take a picture that didn't stand out as a self portrait piece, but just as a beautiful image. Now that I look back I'm second guessing the headphones, on the maturity level....but I still like the image.

I have to do something new

beauty and the moonlight

"She tied you to a kitchen chair. She broke your throne, and she cut your hair"

March 2010

model: Alex

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I went into the shoot wanting to create this feeling of hatred and anger within the photo.

And in the end I really got the opposite. Everything completely changed once I started working with the model, I think he actually became quite vulnerable and unsure once he got in front of the camera. And in that situation you really just need to roll with it, you can't try to turn the shoot into something it's not. In the end the photo may not be what I intended, but it's almost better because of it.

technical things-

Shot with a tethered phase one. The lighting is really simple, just one beauty dish and white seamless.

patience

Winter is really here, it snowed again today. But I'm really glad for the cold, I feel so bundled up and cozy in my house. It makes you really enjoy the holidays.

"Karma is the beginning of knowledge. Next is patience. Patience is very important. The strong are the patient ones. Patience means holding back your inclination to the seven emotions: hate, adoration, joy, anxiety, anger, grief, fear. If you don't give way to the seven, you're patient, then you'll soon understand all manner of things and be in harmony with Eternity." -James Clavell, Shogun

This quote is so beautiful. It really took me back, and forced me to look at things differently.

Hopefully it has the same effect on you.

Recently I've been spending a lot of time browsing through DeviantArt.com , and there is so much beautiful work on that site. I decided to put some up on here to share with anyone who reads this. I know DA gets a bad rep because it's so controlled by today's anime culture, but there really are some incredible artists on the site

So please check out these amazing pieces, as well as the artist's sites!

Skin Deep by Daniel Conway

http://arcipello.deviantart.com/

See You Again by Steph Soh

http://jinx-star.deviantart.com/

When All Hope Is Gone by Elizabeth May

http://auriethepixie.deviantart.com/

Dream State by Fabio Barboni

http://0effe0.deviantart.com/

Nymph

http://sadmadwoman.deviantart.com/

BFF by Nomi Chi

http://god-of-insects.deviantart.com/

Good vs Evil by Vipada Jakavanphitu

http://gtako.deviantart.com/

feeling the pressure

I have been living such a tortured life these past few days.

Since I have almost a month off for winter break, I've had absolutely nothing do to with myself.

HA!

The book I'm reading right now is Shogun by James Clavell, and it is excellent! Though I am only about 700 pages into the huge 1200 page book, I like what I'm reading. Apparently when this book was released in the 80's there was a mini tv series created shortly after based off the book! Even my mom knew about it! Moments such as this make me feel young, regardless I'd still like to get my hands on the mini series once I'm done with the book.

Then I've also been playing Final Fantasy XII, which I have been working on completing for a couple years now! But I'm at the very end, and soon I can put the game to the side and forget about it! woohooo

It is officially 4 oclock in the morning now. Which means I've been trying to fall asleep for 2 hours! I don't know what's wrong with me, but over the breaks I can never manage normal sleeping patterns. I think it has something to do with the fact that I just sit around on my butt all day playing video games, and because of this lack of movement I am never actually tired by bed-time. Strange. I'm gona go get a glass of water.